Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned out
section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest
fire.
The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with
scuba tanks on his back, flippers and face mask.
A post-mortem test revealed that the man died not from burns, but
from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a
positive identification. Investigators then set about to determine how a
fully clothed diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.
It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the man went diving
off the coast, some 20 miles from the forest. The fire fighters,
seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, had called in a
fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from
the ocean and emptied at the site of the forest fire.
You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like Flipper in
the Pacific, the next, he was doing the breast stroke in a fire dip
bucket 300 feet in the air. Some days it just doesn't pay to get
out of bed.
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Still think you're having a bad day?
A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his wife
nearby in the kitchen. While racing the engine, the motorcycle
accidentally slipped into gear. The man, still holding onto the handlebars,
was dragged along as it burst through the glass patio doors.
His wife, hearing the crash, ran in the room to find her husband
cut and bleeding, the motorcycle, and the shattered patio door. She
called for an ambulance and, because the house sat on a fairly
large hill, went down the several flights of stairs to meet the
paramedics and escort them to her husband.
While the attendants were loading her husband, the wife managed
to right the motorcycle and push it outside. She also quickly
blotted up the spilled gasoline with some paper towels and tossed them
into the toilet.
After being treated and released, the man returned home, looked
at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle.
He went into the bathroom and consoled himself with a cigarette
while attending to his business. About to stand, he flipped the butt
between his legs.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her
husband screaming. Finding him lying on the bathroom floor with
his trousers blown away and burns on his buttocks, legs and groin,
she once again phoned for an ambulance. The same paramedic crew was
dispatched.
As the paramedics carried the man down the stairs to the
ambulance they asked the wife how he had come to burn himself. She told
them.
They started laughing so hard, one slipped with the stretcher
and dumped the husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs,
breaking his arm.
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Still having a bad day? Just remember, it could be worse...
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the
most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild
amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full
view, a killer whale ate them both.
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Still think you are having a bad day?
A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking
frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire
running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to
jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a
handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that
moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
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STILL think you're having a bad day?
Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of
sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all
two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence,
stampeding madly. The two hopeless protesters were trampled to
death.
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What?! STILL having a bad day??
Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a
letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it.
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits. There now,
feeling better?