South West Bikers | Motorcycle Forum

I want to thank you all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me your chain emails over the past year.
Thank you for making me feel SAFE, SECURE, BLESSED, and WEALTHY!
Because of your concern...................

I can no longer drink coca cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I can no longer drink anything out of a can because i will get sick from the rat faeces and urine.
I can no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
I no longer go to shopping centres because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me at my car.
I no longer receive packages from Royal Mail since they are actually AL QAEDA in disguise.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask to dial a stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls from Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.
I no longer eat pre-packaged foods because the oestrogens they contain will turn me totally gay.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 364,215 angels looking out for me and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes (the Bible didn't mention it worked that way!).
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the £50,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.
Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooooooooo much for looking out for me !
I will now return the favour.


If you don't send this e-mail to at least 120 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird with diarrhoea will cr*p on your heads at 5:oopm this afternoon and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your house and home.
I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a neighbour's ex-mother-in-laws 8th husband's 2nd cousin's 3rd auntie's neice's beautician !!!!!!!!!

Thats a goodun.. I f**king hate chain mail, delete them everytime.. even though this try to convince you like, "This may look fake like all of the others, but this one is different, I tried it and it really works!"

Like those weight lose programs.. "I lost 12 stone in one hour, try Slimshakes, they really work!!" The only way your lose 12 stone in one hour is with a huge knife..

I hate chain mail too, some people must love it to keep sending it to me!