Buy a Cruiser.........WHY
Posted: Apr 13th, '06, 09:27
Well sportsbikes and big trailee have been done so now lets move onto the bikers that everyone really hates.
Lets face it if u ride a cruiser its really just your secret way of telling everyone your gay (and slightly overweight). Not thats theres anything wrong with being gay but why didn't u just thro a "hello boys i'm coming out the closet" party rather than by a 10 ton piece of chrome.
I mean everyone knows your not really a biker if u ride a cruiser, their dead slow, and they vibrate so much that you'll lose the only 2 remianing real teeth u have left in your gob and they can't go round a bend because as soon as you lean them over even a tiny bit the whole bloody bike is scraping down.
And why are u all so obsessed with chrome???, i don't mean to generalise but you're all fat, hairy overweight old men so why the hell would you want a bike thats effectively a wall of mirrors? And then theres the tassles, u like em on your handlebars, on your jacket sleevs, on your saddlebags (which by the way are Panniers to normal people remember its a motorbike not actually an "iron horse") - surely u guys are having a laugh aren't u I mean only 7 year old girls with pink barbie bicycles like tassles.
The only thing u have in common with real bikers is that u wear leather but even thats not the same as while we wear highly fashionable and purposefully designed race suits u guys insist on wearing outfits u would normally expect to see on a woman who u have to address as "Mistress".
I could go on but i feel its best not to mention the stupid names all your bikes have "marauder" "eliminator....who the hell i u trying to kid!! the only accurately named one was harleys "fat boy".
Lets face it if u ride a cruiser its really just your secret way of telling everyone your gay (and slightly overweight). Not thats theres anything wrong with being gay but why didn't u just thro a "hello boys i'm coming out the closet" party rather than by a 10 ton piece of chrome.
I mean everyone knows your not really a biker if u ride a cruiser, their dead slow, and they vibrate so much that you'll lose the only 2 remianing real teeth u have left in your gob and they can't go round a bend because as soon as you lean them over even a tiny bit the whole bloody bike is scraping down.
And why are u all so obsessed with chrome???, i don't mean to generalise but you're all fat, hairy overweight old men so why the hell would you want a bike thats effectively a wall of mirrors? And then theres the tassles, u like em on your handlebars, on your jacket sleevs, on your saddlebags (which by the way are Panniers to normal people remember its a motorbike not actually an "iron horse") - surely u guys are having a laugh aren't u I mean only 7 year old girls with pink barbie bicycles like tassles.
The only thing u have in common with real bikers is that u wear leather but even thats not the same as while we wear highly fashionable and purposefully designed race suits u guys insist on wearing outfits u would normally expect to see on a woman who u have to address as "Mistress".
I could go on but i feel its best not to mention the stupid names all your bikes have "marauder" "eliminator....who the hell i u trying to kid!! the only accurately named one was harleys "fat boy".
...but
but if its got 2 wheels it cant be bad.................................................................................................................................................................................................................ps. notable exceptions- scooters, goldwings and bath tubs 
