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Hamsters

Posted: Jul 29th, '08, 20:19
by Darklord
Is it just me, or has anyone else noticed what nasty horrible creatures hamsters are?

I think it's some sort of conspiracy, like people who work in pet stores getting their own back on you for something you did in a previous lifetime. You walk in looking for a nice pet for your kids, so they sell you a cute looking furry thing with razor sharp teeth that are as big as its [Censored] head :shock:

It sits there in its cage looking docile and cute and friendly, lulling you into a false sense of security. Then it sits still and watches patiently while you reach in to stroke its soft fur.

Then, with a speed you wouldn't credit; the little [Censored] furry b*stard sinks it's teeth into your finger, before casually wandering off to its bed of shredded newspaper and going back to sleep, while you're stood there in shock watching blood pissing out of your finger.

I mean, why don't they just sell you a nice little Viper or a Funnel Web spider for the kids?

[Censored] furry little [bar steward] [idiot] rodent. I'd feed the little [censored] to my cat if I thought the kids wouldn't notice, which of course they would because they love him because he looks cute. See how cute the evil little bugger looks after I 'accidentally' drop something very heavy on him. :twisted:

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 29th, '08, 22:35
by Maver-Nick
We had 2 of the little sh!ts when the kids were small...

Funny as f*ck when I went into the kitchen one morning to find our fat persian cat had knocked the cage over and was bouncing on one of them... The little furry b@stard was as flat as a pancake... :lol:

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 29th, '08, 22:41
by Johnnyb
Apparently they make very good knob warmers once you force them on, at least thats my excuse your honour :D

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 29th, '08, 22:54
by thelastsuperpower
Johnnyb wrote:Apparently they make very good knob warmers once you force them on, at least thats my excuse your honour :D
:lol: :lol: :lol:


My old school mate went through two hamsters in a week.

the first one "drove itself" :wink: down a flight of stairs in a toy batman car and the second crawled inside his gas fire and was never seen again :shock: :mrgreen:

i dont like those big ballsack things they drag behind em either :?

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 16:25
by Johnnyb
thelastsuperpower wrote:i dont like those big ballsack things they drag behind em either :?
Is that just the cancerous growths that they allways die of or is that just pet Rats, my kids rats allways used to get huge Growths, golf ball sized on them after a year or so then off to the vets to get put down until they started charging for it, then we changed to the humane despatcher which happens to be the same size and shape as my garden spade and its a one shot tool that never misses (obviously the kids never knew that part but did question why the vet gave it back in a box but then changed to burying them in an envelope :lol: :lol: :lol: )

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 17:45
by webster
I had a hamster when i was a kid, nothing unique there i agree, but mine was actually satan in hamster form, it used to attack my dog! Even when we put it in one of those plastic balls, it just used to get a good run up and ram anything that moved.

Was still gutted when it died though :(

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 18:14
by r1dave
We had one called rodney then one day the wife said rodney is dead she gave him a poke didnt move so we burried it only to be told it was hibernating :( :lol: :lol: :lol:

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 19:00
by Johnnyb
webster wrote:I had a hamster when i was a kid, nothing unique there i agree, but mine was actually satan in hamster form, it used to attack my dog! Even when we put it in one of those plastic balls, it just used to get a good run up and ram anything that moved.

Was still gutted when it died though :(
LOL we had one that used to do that, the cat used to pester it all the time in its cage, so when we put it in the ball it used to do a circuit of the living room, get up to speed then ram the cat lying by the fire, funny as hell :lol: :lol: :lol:

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 20:14
by bambam
i am NOT gonna comment on this topic :shock: :shock: :shock:

Re: Hamsters

Posted: Jul 30th, '08, 20:46
by webster
go on, get it out of your system, i'll start you off:

"One day, Richard Gere was bored..."